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Friday, December 16, 2005


Bathroom Humor

Abe (age 2): I have to go to the bathroom.

Me (age 34, getting potty seat): Pee or poop?

Abe: Both!

Me: Here you go.

Abe: I wish I could poop standing up.

Me: No one can do that.

Theo (age 7): Only a professional.

[thinks for a moment]

Or a giraffe!

Or a professional giraffe! I love it. Those two should take their act on the road. More Abe & Theo stories!

So the other day Abe was explaining to Theo how the latest Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inductions disprove the existence of God...
I'm confused - I thought the 2004 election results proved there is no God. Why are your friends confused about this issue? Are you insufficiently didactic?
P.S. Don't tell Hilary, but I'm going to start collecting (and displaying!) figurines from "The Professional".

Hee hee.
Psst, Dave, your secret is safe with me.

Personally, I'm looking forward to the inevitable Brokeback Mountain figurines.

Hoo Hoo.
wait, so does that action figure come with a pint-sized lolitaesque prepubescent natalie portman? If they included the plant they could have at least included the object of his pedophilic affections.
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